hell again

Long time dear diary. How have you been ? Still whoring youself out to the highest bidder ? I thought so.

Life has become strangely apathetic. Or is that, I have become strangely apathetic to life ? I don't know.

I've been listening to some awesome music lately. I've also started writing reviews again. I think I'm better at it now. Check it out dear diary. www.kvltsite.com

Some amazing music that i've heard this year.....
1. Akercocke - Antichrist
2. Antimatter - Leaving Eden
3. Weedeater - God Luck And Good Speed
4. Gorefest - Rise To Ruin
5. Clutch - From Beale Street...
6. Extreme Noise Terror / Driller Killer - Split (Although i'm not sure if this came out this year or the last).
7. Disbelief - Navigator
8. Abscess - Horrorhammer
10. Project: Failing Flesh - The Conjoined
11. Nuerosis - Given To The Rising

I'm sure i've left a few albums out that should be there but this year is looking awesome. All i really need is a new Nevermore and I'm looking forward to the new Monster Magnet which will hopefully come out this year.

The biggest dissapointment this year has to be the new Ministry album. Way too much Tommy Victor in the mix and it just doesn't sound like a Ministry album. Left me completely unmoved and all the samples and anti-republican messages sound a little old on this one. The Last Sucker doesn't suck but its not all that good either. Feels like a very safe effort to go out on. But then I read somewhere that Jourgenson's planning on releasing a covers album sometime next year so in that case this won't be the last sucker at all.

Farewell Dear Mumbai

The man hops along the coach. His stick could be a deadly weapon but it is far more important as a surrogate leg. The dogs are ugly and old. Flies use them for couches but they can still bark. The streets are slushy and dirty, the sky is grey and the atmosphere sticky. The wind, when it deigns to make its presence felt, is in my face. The smells of this city change with every road.

People on the trains stare at me far too much. Most look at me like they want me to smile and acknowledge their stares. Don't smile at strangers. I return their friendly stares with a cold expressionless stare till they drop their gaze. I'll outstare you every single time.

I wrote the above maybe a few weeks after I moved to Mumbai. Now, a little less then 2 years later, when I read this again on the eve of my departure I know that the city has changed me.

I still get the stares but now I smile and get a smile back in return. This city is a friend. Farewell dear Mumbai . I think I'm taking a little bit of you back with me.

2006 and Extreme Metal

I listened to an insane amount of killer extreme metal this past year.

This is my top ten (or eleven) in order of preference.....

Mastodon - Blood Mountain

Magnificent. Evrything that this band hinted at on Remission and Leviathan comes to full fruition on Blood Mountain. It's useless to try and pin this album down because Blood Mountain is far greater than the sum of its influences. Mastodon are at the very top of their game.

Celtic Frost - Monotheist

Fucking come back of the year! It's still Celtic Frost but updated for the new millenium. This is not a nostalgia act. A state of the art of production helps but ultimately its the songs and Monotheist has killer songs from start to finish.

Lamb Of God - Sacrament

Sacrament blew my fucking socks off. Lamb Of God are the true inheritors of a throne left vacant since the demise of Pantera. This is pissed off supremely heavy metal. Listen to this.

Katatonia - The Great Cold Distance

Katatonia have finally made an album thats filled with great songs from start to finish. The doomy atmosphere is still intact but there is a slight change in the sound of the band. The guitars weave and twist and the riffs almost sound delicate. Melancholic without being overly deppresive, The Great Cold Distance is easily Katatonia's most accomplished album in a long while.

Enslaved - Runn

Enslaved have come a long way since Eld. Mixing their Viking extreme metal style with progressive rock, the band have created an absolute masterpiece with Runn. If you liked Below The Lights or Isa then Runn is going to be right up your alley.

Isahn - The Adversary

This album seems to have got a bit lost in the fanfare and sheer expectation levels generated by the reunion of Emperor. The Adversary is a superb extreme metal album. Almost like Isahn satisfied all his avante garde needs with Pecattum and then just decided to record some heavy fucking metal. The songs are well thought out, some great lead guitar playing and embraces different styles within the metal genre. I don't know if Emperor will ever release another album but I hope Isahn does. Super stuff.

Isis - In The Absence Of Truth

If you thought Isis would never be able to top Oceanic and Panopticon, then think again. In The Absence Of Truth sees the band taking a much softer route but the songs still rock. The background drone and the pummeling intensity of previous outings has been replaced in favour of melancholic and at times almost melodic songs that bristle with power. Probably the best doom metal album of the last year without actually being doomy or metal.

The Meads Of Asphodel - In The Name of God Welcome To Planet Genocide

This is the most exciting band in the extreme metal underground today. Mixing a black metal aesthetic with Venom/ Motorhead inspired rock n roll, psychedelia, drum n bass and lead guitars courtesy one Huey Loyd Langton from Hawkwind, The Meads of Asphodel throw everything including the kitchen sink into the mix. This little ep leaves their last full length "Damascus Steel" in the dust. Fantastic.

Sun O))) & Boris - Altar

A collaboration between American drone/ noise band Sun O))) and Japanese loonies Boris was always going to be interesting and Altar lives up to all the promise. Layers and layers of distortion and riffs that crawl along at a snail's pace means that Altar is not an easy listen. Kim Thayil turns up to play lead guitar on Swamp Song but overall this is extreme music. Difficult to digest but worth listening to. Essential headphone music.

Napalm Death - Smear Campaign/ Deicide - The Stench Of Redemption

2 bands from the old school. 2 bands left with nothing to prove and more than 1 seminal album in the bag. Yet Napalm Death's Smear Campaign and Deicide's The Stench Of Redemption have left behind a lot of the younger faster heavier bands. Napalm continue down the merry bludgeoning way set by Enemy Of The Music Business while Deicide's Stench... halts the trend of mediocre albums and almost seems like a follow up to Vital Remains' Dechristianized. 2 terrific albums by the old guard.

Senile ramblings

I'm sitting in a restaurent called Ginger Marie. Mumbai's equivalent of Casa Picola I guess. My new pen writes really well just in case you were wondering Dear Diary. I'm bored. I want to see a movie but nothing i want to catch is on. Little Miss Sunshine at 11:15 pm. I think I'll go watch that.

I have a joint. All rolled up and waiting. Finish dinner, a chicken fettucini pasta Arabiatta. I'm not expecting much. Some semi dry tomato sauce, bits of chicken floating around and the whole thing just drowned in cheese. Lots and lots of cheese cause this is Mumbai and every kind of food you can think of can be served with cheese. Cheese in your dosa and Cheese in your tava pulav. They fucking love it here.

Bangalore was awesome. Maiden, then Scotty's then weed, then beer, food, my room, the company of friends. Bangalore was fucking awesome. The only thing missing was a gas chamber. I think we've all grown up a bit. Tolerance levels have gone down and we all pass out sooner rather than later. The end of an era if you will Dear Diary. The sad bit is, I'm not sure when the end came.

The pasta was pretty good. Spicy, just a sprinkling of parmesan and a nice sauce. I don't know why I didn't come here earlier.

I've just about finished my Hellblazer collection. Almost. Missing Azarello's Good Intentions and Ellis's Setting Sun and Haunted. I think Garth Ennis's contribution to Hellblazer was fucking spectacular. His vision of Satan, Lord Lucifer call him what you will leaves Gaiman's version from Sandman and Mike Carey's version from the spin off in the dust. Ennis's version of Lucifer is just bad ass.

India's out of the World Cup. It was pathetic. I felt embarrased and ashamed. All of my predictions of atleast a semi final berth were consigned to the stuff of dreams. What happens to Indian cricket now is anybody's guess. I'll still watch every game as will millions of my fellow Indiansso the BCCI won't be too bothered. Such a big dissapointment. This country deserved better.

26th March 2007

Iron Maiden was everything I thought it would be and then some. I can't stop smiling. It's been 10 days now and I still can't get over it. I saw Iron fucking Maiden. Fuck everything else. \m/

I'm going back to Bangalore in April.
Farewell Mumbai
I leave my beloved rose in your care.
Treat her well.
Handle her with care.
Don't make me come back.

I have to figure out a lot of stuff. Moving back and all. New job, living at home, and all that. Right now though, all I can really think about is where I'll find the place for my books and music. That's all I can think of. Rome is burning and I'm counting CDs and leafing through Hellblazers.

26/10/06

I'm 27 today. I feel old.

I havent smoked in two days and I cant sleep.

A dull eye burning day so far and its only 6:30am. I saw Dirty Rotten Scroundrels again last night. It did nothing to improve my mood.

Mabool is doing a little better.

Haloween at 10:30pm on saturday and with the way things are going I'll be stuck at work even though it's my off day. Such is life.

Dinner should be good though. Make the dawn seem like a temporary blimp.

Today feels like a whisky weed and Isis day.

The Meads of Asphodel are probably the most exciting extreme metal band today. The new Isis, "In the Absence of Truth" is fantastic but wheres the drone man?

Napalm Deaths "Smear Campaign" is quite simply album of the fucking year!

Best song I've heard all year... Prayer by Neurosis.

PS: I got home early from work on Saturday but the fuckers changed the schedule and played Jeepers Creepers instead.

PPS: Sadly Smear Campaign is no longer album of the fucking year.

The big sleep

She’s sleeping now. As good a time as any for this.

She has a migraine. I think its her brain wanting to step out and go for a walk. As whimsical as they come. I want the world and I want it now.

I can see it now. A sliver of the pink stuff poking out of her ear. “Here I come, ready or not. She’s not going to miss me much anyway.”

It crawls out of her ear. Slowly gathering momentum. I can only sit above her and watch as the thing that used to be her brain comes slithering crawling twisting out. It’s somehow changed into a long thin pink fleshy rope. Like a tapeworm. Yeah, that’s right.

It slithers out finally. All twenty feet of it. Looks around. Crawls to the open window. Turns back for one last look.

“If I’m not back in a day tell her to get a new one”

It crawls out and is soon out of sight.

I almost ask, “How’s she going to wake up if you’re not around?” But it’s long gone and all I have left is its last words.

Get a new one.

I don’t think it’s coming back.

I don’t think I can get her a new one.

Luckily, I don’t think she’ll wake up.

You have all the freedom of speech you will ever need if you're selling. You'll have a bit of it if you're buying. But if you have an honest opinion on anything, we will drag you out, shove you down and kick your head in. Welcome to the largest democracy in the world. The state of the nation is appalling.

I've been sick since last night. A heavy head, a nose that won't stop running and a throat that won't stop itching.

The flies of Mumbai. They're everywhere. At work, in the smoking zone, feeding on the countless drops of coffee spilt by the faceless who have all of seven minutes to finish their coffee and smoke before listening to the next self involved white man. The flies surround my empty coffee cup. It's a fucking invasion.

Muslims can't buy a house in Bandra cause no one will sell to them. The ghettoisation of Mumbai seems unstoppable. Keep them in one corner, keep some in another corner and bury the rest beneath the grimy floorboards of this city and pretend they don't exist.

Playlist:
Anata - The Conductor's Departure
Gorefest - La Muerte
Sadus - Out For Blood
Cryptopsy - Once Was Not

of interruptions and commercial breaks

there is nothing more frustrating than to be interrupted by two cute precocious kids when you're eating out. NOTHING!

Galley Slaves

The acid is back. Big time. Burning me from the inside out. I think the countless cups of instant machine coffee have finally caught up with me.

The work force is being squeezed. Attrition has hit an all time high. Every negative cliche in every management book is being played out here. The galley slave model comes to mind. Easiest to apply. We're sailing a ship and the cruel heartless dictators onshore are weilding a whip that breaks skin and shatters teeth. We are the Galley Slaves. Faster now. Faster.


Here's what my girlfriend got me as an advance birthday gift.
(Sometimes there's nothing left to do but gloat)

Acid Bath - When the Kite String Pops.
Green Carnation - Light of Day, Day of Darkness.
Pungent Stench - Dirty Rhymes and Psycotronic Beats.
Carcass - Necroticism
Arch Enemy - Black Earth

Never a good shepard.

Crumbling Ash. Rolling out onto my chest. Singeing hair before trying to disappear. Nice to know you too.

Uniball Eye of the Mitsubishi Pencil Co. Ltd. writes really well on good quality paper. On cheap paper it blots.

I'm paranoid. I can hear my neighbours shouting 'Bhenchod! Madarchod!' venting their daily anger into the night. Their lights are always on at night. I keep thinking they're staying awake to catch me do something wrong.
Shame on you Aunty Guilt. SHAME.

Assasin Tongue

S, I wrote a random S and couldn't think of anything else. Scary.

Download City

I now know why so many people download music. I couldnt really understand it till now. Instant gratification. Tomorrow, thanks to the wonders of the internet and the generocity of a well meaning stranger, I will have the new Tool, Meshuggah and Scar Symmetry album. I've already planned what I want next. No more Planet M. No more credit card bills that cripple. The download beckons.
March into the Promised Land.

Ruminate

This whole metalcore thing works for a few bands. With God Forbid, it fucking works well. IV:The Constitution of Treason is one big motherfucker of an album.

Shabir ki jai ho! I lie at your feet in quiet admiration. You have surpassed yourself yet again. Fuck. Fuck. God Forbid fucking rocks. Damn.

Operation Mindcrime is a very special album. Spreading the disease, Revolution Calling, The Mission, Suite Sister Mary, just one awesome album. Now theres Operation Mindcrime 2. Very very very nicely produced.

The Gathering have a new album out.

Time to purge...

Angry. Work my butt off for 6 months and see an M.O. What the fuck! So fucking pissed off!! The last few days. Fucking M.O!

Ulver calms me down. I wanted to rant for a bit. Perdition City is like a sedative. Too good. See you later aligator.

2 good months

There's a strong feeling of discontent in our country right now. Don't remember the last time it felt like this. Booming economy or not, India's ordinary people are a discontented lot.

The death of Dr. Rajkumar was a sad bit of news I was at home the next day watching the news on the TV and people talking about why there was so much violence after he died. People at work couldnt understand it, "Why did they get so angry, I thought Bangalore people were educated..."
What nobody seems to get is that, like NTR in Andhra Pradesh and MGR in Tamil Nadu, Rajkumar made millions of Kannadigas proud. When he died his fans needed an outlet for their agression and they took it. Quite forcibly.

There's a broker sitting on the table behind me, strongarming a client to sell.
There are a dozen Bollywood types looking to act in/make or finance a film.
India vs. Pakistan has a few people enthralled but the world that makes this city go round is money.

There's a girl sitting on the table in front of me with her legs split wide open. Her friend tells her to close the gates. Embarrrased, a little shy, she crosses her legs. The man in front of her goes back to his cellphone.

Bombays been mostly good. The last 2 months especially so.
The company of friends and filter coffee is what i miss most.

I have'nt written this much since I moved here. "Sadness?" I hate it when people quote me lyrics of my favourite band and I don't rememeber it. Hate it, Hate hate, hate it!

I'm going to smoke some weed now. The weekend is here. 2 days too early. But who am I to complain? Tomorrow I'll go see Munich and maybe I'll even cheer on as agents of the Mossad claim bloody retribution.

2 men, look like they could be our next action superstars. Sipping on identical strawberry milkshakes with whipped cream on top. Somethings a little off. Somethings not quite right.

Did you watch Rang De Basanti? I loved it. I thought it was an accurate representation of my generation. Sit on our ass and complain about shit but dont move a muscle till things actually hit us head on. It worked as a halfway accurate depiction of the way we lead our apathetic lives rather than just as a case of celluloid patriotism.
But what do I know? I loved Zinda and V for Vendetta too.
Especially the domino scene. Fucking good.

(The strenuous labour of typing out this barely legible handwritten entry was undertaken by SleepyMaggie, the goddess of undeniable philanthropy.)

Playlist

Babylon Whores - Death Of The West
Part Goth, part garage rock and part doom metal, Death Of The West is a solid extreme metal album. Almost sounds like a dirtier Sentenced in parts and Taneli Jarva and Maniac join the band to handle backing vocal duties. The Whores rock.

Prong - Beg To Differ
Released a good 15 years ago, Beg To Differ still sounds pretty damn fresh. Prong was a band just way ahead of its time.

Nevermore - The Godless Endevour
This has been on repeat play for a while now. Politics ver. 2 ? Yes it is. Wit a little more melody this time around. Sell My Heart For Stones and Medicated Nation are just two of the great great songs on this disc.

Revolting Cocks - You Goddamn Son Of A Bitch (Live at the Metro)
Like a bastard child of Ministry and Front 242, this live album dances on the edge of chaos.

System Of A Down - Hypnotise
Finally SOAD release an album thats filled with kickass singalong tunes. The Faith No More touches are still there and I think Tankian prays every night at the altar of Patton but damn, they do this so well. Till there's a Faith No More re-union Hypnotise will do just fine.

In other news, my knees are killing me.

I feel like its time to update with a bizzarre random entry that has a certain sense of WTF about it. I can't. The bizarre, the random and the frequent sense of WTF that this city conjures puts everything i can come up with to shame. I'm living the bizzarre and random. Be it the one legged man hopping along on the last train back home every saturday or the unexplained dissapearence and reappearence of my Tv remote. WTF!

This Godless Endeavor kicks so much ass. I'm totally happy with the new Nevermore. More on that at some point in the future.

I hope to go back to Bangalore in November for a few days. That should be good. Although going to Bangalore for a holiday feels just a little wierd.

update

I feel like its time to update with a bizzarre random entry that has a certain sense of WTF about it. I can't. The bizarre, the random and the frequent sense of WTF that this city conjures puts everything i can come up with to shame. I'm living the bizzarre and random. Be it the one legged man hopping along on the last train back home every saturday or the unexplained dissapearence and reappearence of my Tv remote. WTF!

This Godless Endeavor kicks so much ass. I'm totally happy with the new Nevermore. More on that at some point in the future.

I hope to go back to Bangalore in November for a few days. That should be good. Although going to Bangalore for a holiday feels just a little wierd.

jump for joy

The reason I moved to Bombay.

A few hugged me and said, "Go get her!" Some wished me luck. Some thought I was a fool and some others said nothing at all. One even predicted marriage.

Falling in love has to be the bes thing ever. A brother might beat me on the head for saying this but it's true. It's been fucking spectacular. Lunatic grin. Can't stop. Fucking Metronome. I love her and I can't stop smiling.

"Jump For Joy"