drugs are bad

I don’t remember the last time I went to sleep sober. I tried to remember but I just couldn’t. Memory goes for a toss when you smoke up every fucking day. Or so they say. The last four days I’ve been sober and I’ve never felt so fucking miserable. Escape. I love to escape and marijuana lets me escape. Its just marijuana. Its not cocaine. Its not heroin. I’m addicted to marijuana. I’m turking in my room for marijuana. I’ve made fun of people for this. “How can anybody turk for marijuana ?” I know now. I feel like a wuss. This is my cry for sympathy but I’d be lucky to get a slap on my face. I don’t remember the last time I slept sober. I don’t remember the last time I took a break that I was able to sustain. Yes I do. Just now. My memory isn’t all gone. November – December 2003. I’ve been smoking the weed pretty much non-stop since then. When I roll myself a cigarette and smoke it my brain stops screaming. I can fool myself. I’m not addicted I just like the high. I fool myself.

Now is the time to climb on my soapbox and warn the children of the world about the evils of marijuana. I will not. Just one good marijuana trip outweighs all the evils it might contain. So fuck it. If you've never smoked weed then you have no idea what i'm talking about and you can be ignorant and happy. If you have smoked it, then you know what I'm talking about. So then, back to being a weekend warrior dear diary. Lets see how this goes then.