Wednesday, December 30, 2009

The last time I heard her giggle. At me. With me. I didn't care. It felt good and I was happy to see her and talk to her and be there.

Monday, December 28, 2009

dead years and dead smiles

The new year is fast approaching and I'm bored for way too much of the time and sad and restless and empty for the rest of the time. Without getting overly dramatic I think the last 6 months of 2009 have been more than a little crazy and I don't remember the first 6.

laughter lines run deeper than skin and the world's just something that the cat dragged in

I've been listening to a fair bit of anarcho punk lately. Not sure yet what this genre entails in terms of music but they have some severely strong political views. Anyway, what is the musical commonality between Aus Rotten, CRASS and Chumbawamba? I'll be fucked if I know but all three are this strange genre called anarcho punk. They hate fascists, rascists and all bad people and seem like nice liberal people. I don't have a problem with NSBM and I don't have a problem with anarcho punk. I like them both but I'm guessing both camps hate each other.

The biggest surprise though was going to these sites and finding out that Chumbawamba is considered punk. WTF! How? This is the same band that made Tub Thumping, Laughter in the Time of War and acapella covers of The Clash. Punk? I didn't think so. Very cool band though and here's them doing an acoustic version of Homophobia

CRASS on the other hand sound like nothing I've ever heard before. At least their early stuff seemed like punk and they slowly moved away to do their own uniquely British sound. I fell in love with this band a while back and this was where it all started pretty much. At least with me listening to punk.

Aus Rotten are angry motherfuckers. And probably vegans and straight edge and everything and also American and hardcore but anarchists and I guess why they're labelled anarcho punk along with everything else ...And Now Back To Our Regular Programming sounds fucking angry and comes with the most scary tobacco ad I've heard.

So anyway, time pass post. and I'll leave you dear diary with the longest album name ever.

Friday, December 25, 2009

a lost case, never found

I used to talk a lot
then stayed silent for too long
I used to bite off more than I could chew
then stopped biting for a time
I washed my best friend's blood
Off my hands and face
Then spoke about it to no one no one no one

I used to play and sing and dance
then stopped it for nothing at all
I used to live in fits and starts
and then stopped to drift
No way was I putting my foot in it
a big ugly festering pool of slime
Instead I washed in her sins and felt clean

I held too many secrets for far too long
Then tried to stop but couldn't
Holding it in is easy when you have practice
But when my brain runs in slow motion
and my tongue starts to wander
I find myself opening the lock on the door
More and more often.

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

THC for one

I think tomorrow's going to be a bit weird. I'll remain discrete as much as I want to tell the whole world about it. You're the only one who'll know. Weird craziness more like. Like.

I found a new band today. New for me at least. O' Death, play some really American music. Bluegrass, country, soul all wrapped up somehow in a punk attitude with some serious songwriting chops. I'm liking this band a lot.

Also, A Girl Called Eddy. This is quite nice. Listening to all this pop music is somehow liberating. I feel gay but I'm okay with it. I'm also really thinking about adding a disclaimer.

I'm very bored. I had a stab at finishing something and couldn't but this band is so good. I'm rambling. Ha. I saw a fantastic movie called The Hurt Locker about a bomb disposal squad of three American soldiers in Iraq. I think my biggest mistake in life was made a long time ago. I think I'm eternally grateful. I think I'm living in fits and starts. I think I should stop but sometimes you just don't want to. I play Mario and can't get past level 4. I play cricket and my shoulder hurts for a day. Fits and starts. Life. Being old means living less? I hope not. I feel particularly young and energetic on a good day but most days are just a bit dull. I do the same things over and over but I wouldn't change a thing. Like the reporter said, “where else will I go?”

I'm also feeling very nostalgic man. I walked by Kanti Sweets the other day looking at my old college. It was reassuring to see a bunch of college kids sitting on the steps of the sweet shop but they were actually eating sweets. The cold badam milk used to be insane there. The coffee used to suck ass.

I cannot tell a lie. I can and I do. I'm going to be telling some whoppers tomorrow at around 10:30 am. Again, you're the only one who knows. The weird craziness never goes away. Not fully. Scott H Biram as another new discovery. Very nice. I think my work is done here now but I'll hang on for a bit. I'm hoping for inspiration but will settle for a good movie. I'm holding my hand over my heart but my fingers are crossed. Can't hold on in this quicksand ground and I'm sinking in it. This year, my big discovery was outlaw country and just plain country.

My work here is done.

Put. That. Coffee. Down. Coffee's for closers only.

Today, I remembered exactly why I love Alec Baldwin. I think anybody who's ever been in a sales situation at work can relate. Awesome dialogues, awesome Baldwin. Fantastic movie.

Saturday, December 19, 2009

close shaves

I just finished a rather fine shave to go along with the one I had yesterday. The lawyer's calling it the hump of the century. I'm glad he managed to fall straight down. A little bit to the left or the right would have been danger.

Today gives fuck all a whole new meaning and depth.

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Best ofs :)

2009 - extreme metal

1.Goatwhore – Apocalyptic Havoc
(From the album Carving Out The Eyes of God)

The opening riff is one of the most unabashed kick ass riffs I’ve heard all year and this song just makes me want to bang my head. Awesome opener from a great album.

2.Sacrifice – Tetragrammaton
(From the album The Ones I Condemn)

The comeback album of the year and the bands best by a long way. This song is awesome mid pace thrash metal.

3.Napalm Death – Time Waits for No Slave
(From the album time waits for no slave)

It’s Napalm like they’ve always been but also just a little bit better than the last couple of albums.

4.Earth Crisis – To Ashes
(From the album To the Death)

Metal-core in the truest sense of the word. Earth Crisis will kick your head in.

5.Vomitory – Serpents
(From the album Carnage Euphoria)

Old school death metal done superbly

6.Hearse – The Moth
(From the album Single Ticket to Paradise)

This band does not get enough love. Awesome guitar work on this song and Liiva’s vocals have never sounded this good.

7.Martyrdod – Gloria Runt Iris
(From the album Sekt)

Another band that seems to exist only to cause aural carnage. Fantastic.

8.Immortal – Rise of Darkness
(From the album All Shall fall)

Spoke too soon about the Sacrifice. This is probably the comeback of the year)

9.Marduk – Funeral Dawn
(From the album Wormwood)

Marduk has grown in leaps and bounds over the last two albums and this song is pretty much the pinnacle of the new Marduk)

10. - A Sutra of Wounds
(From the album Resplendent Grotesque)

It’s been a great year for extreme metal bands with a slight black metal touch and ’s album has been on my play list all year round.

11.Wolves in the Throne Room – A Looming Resonance
(From the ep Malevolent Grain)

Getting the chick from Hammers of Misfortune to sing over the band’s sludgy black metal was a masterstroke.

12.Anaal Nathrakh – More of Fire than Blood
(From the album In the Constellation of the Black Widow)

Just when I thought I’d be getting a cleaner less dangerous Nathrakh, these two fellows pulled out all the stops and showed off a perfect exercise in brutality. Just awesome from start to finish.

2009 – Sludge, stoner and other heavy shit

1.Giant Squid – Dead Man’s Slough

(From the album The Ichthyologist)

More Tom Waits sounding that sludge but awesome song from a fantastic album)

2.A Storm of Light – Midnight
(From the album Forgive Us Our Trespasses)

Call it whatever you want to but this band blew my mind with their mix of post metal, Neurosis inspired sludge and total Euro doom worship. Awesome shit.

3.16 – Man Interrupted
(From the album Bridges to Burn)

Sludgy heavy goodness.

4.Coalesce – Wild Ox Moan
(From the album Ox)

Down and dirty delta blues done in the band’s very own apocalyptic hardcore style. One of my favourite songs this year from any genre.

5.Keelhaul – THC for One
(From the album Triumphant Return to Obscurity)

The more I heard this album the more I liked it till the liking became a deep love and left me in awe

6.Taint – Black Rain
(From the ep All Bees to the Sea)

Awesome. Never been a fan but this little ep blew my mind

7.Minsk – Three Moons
(From the album Echoes in the Movement of Stone)

This band is getting better and better with every release and the new album is an absolute killer.

8.Kongh – Voice of the Below
(From the album Shadows of the Shapeless)

Kongh just upped the level of their game this year. The album is a monster and this song is brilliant.

9.Salome – With Hell for a Mouth
(From the split album with Thou called Our Enemy Civilisation)

Two of my favourite sludge bands got together this year for a split album that’s been blowing my mind. This is Salome at their best.

10.Gaza – The Meat of a Leg Joint
(From the album He is Never Coming Back)

Second album and this band have already come up with an album that is very very close to being an absolute classic. Fantastic stuff.

11.Cable – The Failed Convict
(From the album The Failed Convict)

Cable’s new album is just a master class in post hardcore sludge songwriting. Must must listen.

12.Shrinebuilder – Blind for all to See
(From the album Shrinebuilder)

This song is driven by Al Cisneros’s bass groove and has a terrific jammy feel pretty much like the entire album.

13.Thou – The Song of Illuminate Darkness
(From the split with Salome called Our Enemy Civilisation)

More awesomeness from Thou. Maybe more melodic than before and probably even more awesome than anything they’ve done before.

iggy and tom and coffee and cigarettes

Sunday, December 13, 2009

Thursday, December 10, 2009

the nights feel empty, the days feel too long, this winter smells of death and I'm all alone

I woke up today with a sore throat, an aching body and a vague feeling of discontent and loss. I guess this is what it means to be old. Maybe.

In my younger days this would have meant getting hammered and maybe doing some hammering. Now I just sit on the computer and update you. I guess this is what it means to be old. Maybe.

I spend far too much time these days hoping for things to be better. It's a sad state of affairs and one I've mostly succumbed to out of choice which only makes it all the more tragic.

Nothing to be done about it
I should just walk a good long ways
But my legs are broken
And have been for days

A hunger which will go unfed
A yearning which will not be trusted
A mistake that I'll pay interest on forever
A hole inside made by the word never

I should just walk away
But I simply don't want to
My legs leave me aching
So what if I did the breaking?

I have the gay. Don't come any closer and if you do, then wear a gas mask or something.


Tuesday, December 01, 2009

La vida no vale nada

i'm tired of this uncertainty
i'm tired of pretending i can take it
i'm tired of my own indifference
i'm scared i sound like an emo kid
Too much pressure too much to consider

I had one of those perfect weekends. Everything went by with no planning or even thought. I went with the flow and it was entertaining from start to finish. I found happiness in the leg of a chicken then surprise at Guzzlers and a stoned giggling bliss all over. Life was almost perfect.

They played Look at Yourself in Guzzlers. Why have I not been there in 13 years?

Finished watching Limits of Control. What a movie. This is the trippy shit. Where story takes backseat to form. I loved it. It seemed like it was about whatever you wanted it to be. And any film that references Stalker is all sorts of win. I wish there was more naked Paz de la Huerta but that's a minor complaint.

Also watching some TV show called Trailer Park Boys. Supposed to be hilarious. So far it's not.

What is this boss?
I don't know chief.
It's new and gets a bit unpleasant now and then.
I think we might have a problem.
Yes, I think we might.

Enough nonsense?
You're asking the wrong guy.

I hope to finish Miike's Izo one of these days. I'm stuck at the 40 minute mark and unable to proceed. Very arty and abstract and doesn't make much sense. I should just watch Gozu again as should everybody. At least once.

Anyway, enough. Later.